There’s a new VH1 reality show called “Why Am I Still Single?” airing this Sunday night at 9pm. Why do you give a shit about this? Because our very own Goddamn Western star Rich Awn is in the very first episode. No lie.
Tune in and and turn up as host and fake name connoisseur Siggy Flicker talks openly about faking orgasms with her ex-husband within the first, like, 30 seconds of the show. Awesome. And if that’s not enough for you, her crew of “love-pickers,” who each have at least 2 y’s in their first name, will undoubtedly throw you over the edge. This show is definitely trashy enough to encourage drinking, so I’m gonna go ahead and take a shot each time Siggy says the word “bologna” and Rich raises one of his eyebrows.
If you can’t stand Siggy’s weird accent and gigantic lips long enough to finish the episode, or you’re already drunk because Rich raised his eyebrows that many times, I’ve posted a list of tweetable quotes, some sweet screenshots and memorable hashtags below. Touchdown in the friend zone.
“What AREN’T I doing this summer?” – Rich
“Touchdown in the friend zone.” – Rich
“Ooohh, it’s so long!” – Katie
“I’m like the George Clooney of Brooklyn.” – Rich
“Slicker than grease.” – Rich
“I didn’t know I needed that much to look good!” – Katie
“You have a nice eyes too.” – Italian guy
“Dating is a crapshoot.” – Siggy
#richisms
#friendzone
#dropthebomb
#LTR
@DORKLORD Says:
October 18, 2011 at 18:19
Legit post. Nice on Sarah.
I’ll say that Siggy is indeed like a broadway show incarnate but she’s totally sweet and dives into her work voraciously… perhaps alarmingly so. Like me, she says whatever comes to mind and laughs about the shrapnel later. The whole production was totally cool and mellow throughout. No dicks.
In the end, I did this to jam the illusion of reality TV by berzerking through it while using it as a platform for absurdity with the purpose of making all my friends laugh. Mission accomplished.
Now let’s see if they’ll give me my own show.
#RichDatesthe50States
#RichDatesJapan
#RickyKnowsWhatToDo
#RickyinCharge
sarak Says:
October 20, 2011 at 13:09
All in good fun, m’love. I love her sass & her adorable used car salesman husbo. Seems like a rad lady.
xo